Communication


Communication in Lexington, Richmond & Frankfort KY

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What is Communication?

Communication issues can develop in any circumstance or social relationship. It can be easy for individuals to misunderstand or misinterpret others, and these misunderstandings may lead to arguments or tension in personal, platonic, or professional relationships. One of the most distressing realities for many couples is learning that they are not able to communicate effectively. Since communication is the foundation of a thriving relationship, couples that address the problem have a great opportunity to build a lasting bond

Signs & Symptoms

Communication issues can stem from both emotional and psychological issues from early childhood relationships, previous romantic relationships, or other areas of life. Here are some examples of issues that can lead to communication problems:
  • Unresolved baggage from youth - A frequent cause of misunderstanding in relationships is unresolved baggage from youth. Examples of baggage from youth include preconceived ideas and experiences regarding sexuality, the proper way to raise children, how you relate to and handle money, and self-esteem issues.
  • Unfulfilled expectations - We often have preconceived expectations of what marriage and relationships are supposed to be like. The biggest problem with expectations in general is that we may know what our expectations are, but it unlikely that our partner does! It is your job to learn to fill yourself up and then offer all you can to the relationship.
  • Sex and Intimacy - Sex is one of the most common areas of conflict in many relationships. Chronic disappointment and dashed expectations can manifest in a serious loss of intimacy in a relationship. If there is a lack of intimacy with regard to the basic friendship in the relationship, it is also expressed (or not!) in some manner in the bedroom.
  • Resentments - It is critical in the treatment of relationships to uncover these often unknown or unspoken resentments. The focus is not on how the other person needs to change, but rather on what you can do to change yourself. Resentments often build as a direct result of a person's inability to communicate their needs and/or take responsibility for them in the first place. 
  • Infidelity – Affairs are often used as a way to lick one's wounds, to escape from the difficulties of the current relationship, or to abandon the responsibility we have to work on the troubles in our relationships. Relationships can heal from this most devastating of betrayals, but full responsibility, remorse and true commitment to self-development must be the foundation for the healing.
Diagnosis & Treatment Options

Marriage counseling is designed to give you guidance in any area of your relationship where you are feeling doubt, uncertainty, or hesitation. If you and your partner are not able to express your thoughts and feelings in a productive way, counseling will also give you the space and freedom to do that. Marriage counseling can help improve communication issues and relationship problems by:

  • Changing the views of the relationship. Marriage counseling attempts to help both partners see the relationship in a more objective manner. Therapy focuses on altering the way the relationship is understood, so the couple can start to see each other, and their interactions, in more adaptive ways.
  • Modifying dysfunctional behavior. Effective marriage counseling tries to change the way that the partners actually behave with each other. This means that in addition to helping them improve their interactions, therapists also ensures that their clients are not engaging in actions that can cause physical, psychological, or economic harm.   
  • Decreasing emotional avoidance. Couples who avoid expressing their private feelings put themselves at greater risk of becoming emotionally distant and growing apart. Effective marriage counseling helps their clients bring out the emotions and thoughts that they cannot effectively express to the other person. 
  • Improving communication. Marriage counseling focuses on helping the partners to communicate more effectively. Couples may require coaching to learn how to speak to each other in more supportive and understanding ways, as well as to learn how how to listen more actively and empathically.
  • Promoting strengths. Marriage counseling points out the strengths in the relationship and build resilience, particularly as therapy nears a close. The point of promoting strength is to help the couple derive more enjoyment out of their relationship. 

There Is Hope!

If your relationship is suffering from communication problems, marriage counseling can help! Call our office today to set up an appointment, or visit these websites for more information.

New Client Info
Lexington, KY

Darby Creek Location
501 Darby Creek Road
Suite 11
Lexington KY, 40509
Phone: 859-338-0466
Fax: 859-294-0802

Recent Posts
By Paul Dalton 05 Feb, 2016
So you live in Kentucky and only a few more weeks until spring. Everyone should be happy and feel better about that, right? I think most of us get a sense of relief and hope, and that cognitive energy to bust out of the winter season and get moving. For some, the spring can be a rough time. Depression, anxiety, bi-polar disorder, and relationship issues prevent the spring season from being all that it could be. Following are some reasons that these and other conditions may worsen in the spring, a few resources for you, and some concrete strategies you can implement to help yourself. 

So why do people struggle some in the spring when it should be all flowers and sunshine? 

1. Sleep
Many times the spring season causes a change in our circadian rhythm . The sun wakes you up in the am, it is difficult to keep a routine, and restlessness all contribute to the sleep problem. Our eating in the winter and spring can affect how much we sleep. Caffeine, napping, undereating, and how much we are moving, all contribute to how much we sleep. Spring likely has an effect on melatonin in the body, which aids in sleep. 

Strategies that help are EXERCISE and EATING RIGHT! If you keep moving with the help of  a tool like a Fitbit or utilize regular exercise of 45 minutes or more 4-5 times per week, you are far less likely to have sleep problems. Exercise helps you sleep. Exercise helps you eat better. Eating and sleeping adequately can reduce your stress and fight any symptoms you may have. Eating healthy keeps your mind, body, and spirit in a positive place. When your body is well, your mind has a great chance of being well too. Sounds too simple? Give it a try!

The sleep foundation can help here :  Sleep Foundation Healthy Sleep Tips
Eating Right For Spring
Here is a good link to read on symptoms getting worse in the spring: Spring Makes Symptoms Worse

2. Spring Fever is Real
Our office has existed for over 15 years now. I can tell you that March to May is our busiest time of the year, always. Bipolar disorder, marital infidelity, depression, and anxiety are the main reasons people call us in the spring. The real causes of spring fever include longer days that produce more sunshine and increased energy, changes in hormone production, sleep cycles, nutrition and diet changes, body needs, and possibly, a lack of self care. When we bust of out winter here in Kentucky we sometimes forget that it takes a little time to get our minds and bodies in shape for yard work, spring cleaning, and for many, an increased workload all the way around. Here are some links to let you know spring fever is real. 

Spring Fever
WEB MD-You Give Me Spring Fever
Wiki Spring Fever
Spring Time Bad for Depression

3. Expectations Are High

Sometimes in spring we have been thinking about all the things we should of, could of, would of done if we had lived in San Diego or Florida during our winter days. The reality of being human can set in when we find out that spring has sprung, it is time to get moving, and we don't have the energy or drive to complete our list of high expectations. Many people are disappointed in themselves and these outcomes. Don't worry about it. 

Strategies you can use include setting small attainable goals you can feel good about. Work on your list a little at a time. Make goals that regular people can reach with time built in for you to EXERCISE AND SLEEP. Do a mix of things that you enjoy and are healthy for you while completing your responsibilities. If you deny yourself from pleasure too long, that strategy is likely to backfire. Have a good balanced approach. Use a checklist that has 3 sections. One section is for today. One section is for the week. Reserve one part of the list for things your are really wanting to do. Put a vacation or planned fun activities on a calendar. Look up things you might want to do during that time online. Planning, thinking and dreaming are fine. They keep us hopeful. 

Tiny Buddha Expectations and Disappointment
Expectations at The Silent Blog
Three Ways Expectations Can Hurt You

4. Allergies

If you live in Kentucky, you know about allergies. Kentucky is known to be one of the worst states when it comes to spring and fall allergies.  Louisville is ranked as one of the worst cities in the entire country to live in due to allergies.   Many times people are unaware they are being affected. Sometimes the symptoms are less obvious than a runny nose, cough, and cold like symptoms. Many times people are lethargic, grouchy, have headaches, and have cognitive deficits. The allergic affect we have in Kentucky can quickly turn into a sinus infection, bronchitis, ear infections, and other maladies that make us mentally and physically drained. That flower below can cause us some issues! 

Get to a doctor. Take a seasonal allergy medication. Some are mild, like Allegra (please get your physician's approval before taking allergy medications) and can be taken everyday. Prescription nose sprays may help, but may also have some cognitive or mood altering side effects. Be careful, but don't suffer! Get help from an allergist if you need it. 

Allergy Resources
Pollen Map
How to Beat Spring Allergies by WEB MD
By creekmoremarketing 21 Sep, 2015

Welcome to our website!

Therapy is a great choice. It works, and I hope you make a commitment today to start. Most people find the idea of attending therapy with a therapist or counselor far more scary than the actual process itself. Here is a link that describes how the process works at our locations.

Our therapists are located in Lexington, Frankfort and Richmond, KY. See individual profiles of our therapy providers here . I hire our professionals personally and attempt to provide you with someone that will care about your outcome and treat you well. These are experts at counseling and therapy and provide services you will want to tell others about.

Our clinicians care, and you will know they are different in that respect. Providing therapy in Central Kentucky is much more than a job to our therapists. It is a profession, and a way of life.

Please let us help you today!   Contact us here   or at 859.338.0466 now.

Sincerely,

Paul D. Dalton, MS, LPCC, CADC

More Posts
What is therapy?

Therapy is more long-term than counseling and focuses on a broader range of issues. The underlying principle is that a person's patterns of thinking and unconscious awareness affect the way that person interacts with the world. The goal is to uncover those patterns and become aware of their effect and then learn new, healthier ways to think and interact.
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